Learning English

The dog ate my homework

Let's admit it: there are times when we just can't face doing the things we are supposed to do. Who really wants to get out of bed on a freezing cold January morning to go to work? Who can force themselves to do that boring piece of maths homework when they could be watching their favourite TV show instead? And who wants to pay a bill for something they don't even use?

On such occasions, some people might think about lying. In this article, you'll read some real excuses that people have used. You might find it difficult to believe that only one of them isn't a real excuse.

To do

Read this article quite quickly. It talks about various real excuses that people really have used. But one of them is not real - we made it up! Which one do you think is not a real excuse? The answer is at the bottom of the article.

Read the text and complete the activity

Terrible excuses

Part 1
Have you ever taken a sickie? If so, what did you say to your boss? It seems many people in the UK like to blame their pets for their absence. One person said they couldn't come to work because their rabbit was missing. Perhaps that was a white lie; this next one though sounds more like a porky.

A worker said that he couldn't come to work because he had to take his dog to the vet. This might seem reasonable - apart from the fact that the man told his boss his dog was dead as a previous excuse for skiving off.

Part 2
If you've ever worked as a teacher, you'll know that children can be very creative when it comes to excuses for not doing their homework. Once again, it's popular to blame pets. According to a BBC survey, almost 10 percent of excuses involve pets eating the assignment. "The dog ate my homework" is a legendary excuse - no one is sure if a student has ever really used it. More sinister is the claim that one pupil made: she said that she saw a ghost flying away with her homework in the night.

Part 3
But it's not just workplaces and schools which attract fibbers. People caught claiming welfare benefits illegally have also tried to con the authorities. A husband whose wife was working while also on the dole said that he didn't know she had a job because he was always in the garden shed during working hours. 

In the UK, people need to buy a licence in order to watch TV. And it's pets again that people rely on for their alibi. One man who didn't pay said, "Apparently my dog, which is a corgi, was related to the Queen's dog so I didn't think I needed a TV licence".

Part 4
There are many more ridiculous excuses people have made for not doing the things they were supposed to do. But there isn't enough room on this page to fit them all. And besides, I can't carry on because the cat's eaten my keyboard.

Which excuse was not real?

We made up this excuse:

"More sinister is the claim that one pupil made: she said that she saw a ghost flying away with her homework in the night."

To do

Now it's time to look at the article in detail. Read it again and then answer the questions. They will test your general understanding and your knowledge of linking devices of cause and effect. Good luck!

Your terrible excuses

Have you ever made a bad excuse? We'd love to hear some!

Thank you for emailing your comments to us. We enjoyed reading them. This task is now closed.

Here are some of the comments that we received:

Vasyl, Ukraine

Once, when I went to school, I was late. Entered the premises I was caught by principal, consequently I was compelled to write an excuse of such a  misdeed. Owing to a great deal of time and calling bad weather to witness, I narrated a whole detective story in which I had been hiking and splashed up by car. As a result I came back home to change an attire. In excuse I noted the vehicle's brand, colour and even the registration number as though I could really recall it and it had the slightest importance!

Manoel, Brazil

The worst excuse I've ever made was ten years ago. I had forgotten completely my wife's birthday and when I came back home from the work, I heard my daughter giving congratulations to her mommy. I hadn't bought a present; as a result, I didn't know what to say. Then I told a white lie. I said to her that I really bought a gift, but when I was coming home, I saw a very sad poor woman. I felt sorry and I gave her the present that I've bought.

Trinh Viet Linh, Vietnam

I would like to tell about one of my bad excuse to refuse drinking alcoholic drinks.

First of all, let me just fill you in with background. There is a fact that Vietnamese use too much alcoholic drinks, brandy in particular, whereas fake and imitation ones are widespread on the market. As consequently, it is really high risk for the drinkers. In addition, I am really not good at drinking. I therefore always refuse whenever to be offered to drink and I always excuse by saying that I have a problem with my stomach that the doctor directed to keep away from alcoholic drinks. It is a white lie, of course, but it worked. 

Juan Carlos, Colombia

Hello everybody, really yes, I have made several bad excuses in my life, but the worst excuse that I have made it was when I was studying at the college school. Let me just fill you in with the background...three years ago, I had to take a test of the subject of fuzzy control, but the last night before the test, I went to a party with my friends and we started to drink different kind of alcoholic drinks and the next day I had a terrible hangover and I was to call to the university and I told them that I crashed my car the last night and I was arrested that night. Two days after, Finally I took the test but, I lost it.

Aroa, Spain

What I am going to tell you is not an excuse, it is something it really happened to me. Anyway it seems an excuse and it is very funny.

It was my cousin's wedding so I got home really tired at night. I left my ID card and my driving license on the sofa and I went straight to bed. The following day I didn't find either the license or the ID card. I spent one week looking for both things. Unfortunately I didn't found them and I needed the ID card because i was going to travel so I had to renew it. After some time one day we were tidying up the drawers which were under the bed and suddenly we found both, the ID card and the driving license. Obviously they both had been bitten by my dog who seemed to have been playing with them the night of the wedding. Although the driving license was broken I didn't have the new one so I have to put that in my wallet. That night I was driving when suddenly the police stopped me and asked me for the driving license. I was really really embarrased but I had to tell him that my dog had eaten my driving license. The police got a bit angry, he thought it was an excuse but I showed it to him. When he saw that he started to laugh. Thanks goodness I didn't get a fine.

Marco

Last winter, a morning I decided to stay at home avoiding to go to my work, so I invented an excuse not very brilliant. Infact I remember it was a nice day in the winter, but I called my boss telling him that there was a terrible snow storm on my village. Unfortunately my house is far from my factory only 15 kilometers. To conclude, the day after my colleagues, while I was trying to explain my terrible excuse to my boss, they kidded me imitating a man that is removing the snow.

Pierre, Belgium

Hereafter is a white lie I used to avoid to go to work:

This was a day on Augustus. My boss was on holiday. At that time, my workplace was at about 120 kilometres from my house. On this morning, I didn't want to drive and I sent a message to my colleagues:

"Hi there, I'm sorry but my car seems to have a problem. The battery seems to be low. The car doesn't start. I won't be able to come at work."

I was stupid because my car was new and all my colleagues understood the lie. The boss was on holiday; consequently, there was no consequences. But I'm ashamed to have let my colleagues worked more because of me. This will never happen again.

Marisol, Spain

I've never used any excuses for not working, but I know some people who they are real expertes.

One day, a colleague called to our workplace and she said that she couldn't go to work because of she had the ash's grandfather in her car and she couldn't leave here.

Another colleague said us that he couldn't go on time every day owing to he had to go out with his dog in the morning and he couldn't go earlier due to it was colder and his pet could get a bad cold.

Taras, Ukraine

I used to do bad excuses for my skiving off. These were mainly in school and I taken sickie. For examples, I missed a particular class and when I faced with a teacher as excuse I always told that I was sick and that's why I wasn't attended in the classroom. Fortunately or not, I have never taken a sickie in my job.

Mario, Italy

When I was a child, I often used to wake up late in the morning and, consequently, I often used to be late for school. Since everybody knew, including my teacher, that my house was beside the school, I always had to make up new excuses and every time I entered the classroom, my teacher asked me, ironically, questions such as 'What happened this time? Was the lift in your building on strike? Did your brother take the battery out of your alarm clock for his walkman? Did your dog hide your clothings? Parking problems?”. Fortunately, my teacher was a very tolerant person.

Ahmed

I'd like to tell you about our colleague big excuse that, all of us thought is was a serious matter, Let me fill you in with the backstory.
our colleague decided to lift our company whereas he had just got a promotion hence, he was shy and didn't find any thing to tell except a huge lie! thus, he told us that he's sick and will need a serious surgery he even more visited our office wearing medical equipment and he decided to sign-off in order to make the surgery and don't waste company time with his health issue! and after few months we knew that he lift to comparative company.

Francesco, Italy

I hate to be late; consequently, I'm always just in time so I don't have to excuse me to anyone.

Only once, when I was child, I came to school late because of I met Spiderman during a fight with a monster; consequently, I gave him my help to kill the monster. 

Another time, when I was 30, I was late to work because of Batman gave me his car but I didn't know how  land.

There are a lot of situations that may embarrass us; as result, we have to learn how find a good solution.

I think and hope, that all the people around the world will be able.

Rita, Spain

I have to recognize that the worst excuse i have ever given was not addressed to another person but myself. 

I was operated from a disc hernia and due to the fact that it wasn´t a success, i needed to be operated twice more. 

This happened along 5 years´ time and in the following  5 years i had a lot of suffering  owing to the pain.Therefore, i tried many therapies as rehabilitation, accupunture, quiropractics, and ozon therapy. They seemed to work for two or three months  and after that relief period,  i returned to feel so bad as before again. 

The point is that i had convinced myself about my own unability to recover because of my negative mental attitude.

Later, big changes happenned in my life: getting divorced and moving to another town made me realize that i  could really get bettter, with some effort and lots of constance.

Finally I am living on my own, with some handicaps but i am dong things i could never have imagined when i was cheated by my own mental excuses.

Pawan Bhandari, Nepal

Chucking a sickie was my bad habit when I read in school; consequently,  I had to make do on very few notes during the exams. My habit worsened when I missed the terminal exam owing to the fabrication of a lie that I was sick.  It was this time I made up the story that I had caught jaundice; but in fact, I had very minor headache. I was very apprehensive about my Principal asking me the medication report. But thankfully,  he believed me as I had told my mother to say so. Today, I remorse my wrong doings; I feel , if I hadn't been involved in pulling sickies, I would have got the better result. 

José, France

Sometimes, as a student, there are some days where I don't want to do anything. So these days I made some terrible excuses to myself in order to avoid doing my homework. For instance, a very bad reason I often give to myself for not doing my homework is the fact that it's raining outside. Shame on me...

There we can notice that a terrible excuse to yourself can be the origin of new meaningless excuses to other people. To go on with the example previously given, from there, my parents can notice that I'm doing nothing, so they may probably call me for houseworks. Then I will have to invent a new excuse to escape from the household chores.

Finally it's a kind of a vicious circle : a lie leads to another.

End of Session 4

How was that? You have lots of excuses now. We hope you don't try to use them. Join us in Session 5 for the final part of our drama, Jamaica Inn. Mary finally discovers who murdered her aunt and uncle. Now she needs help - but who can she turn to?