The waterpark for goths and other things we learned on World Goth Day

On World Goth Day 2016, we spoke to three influential goths about what they make of it all.

Lee aka DJ Cruel Britannia (you’ll see each of our contributors have names like that) founded World Goth Day and is perhaps one of the most influential goths in Britain. Tim Sinister (see) does the marketing for Whitby Goth Weekend, one of the biggest goth get-togethers in the calendar. And John Waterpark (that’s how his email appears) set up the world’s first and only waterpark for goths (to our knowledge) over in Tennessee.

Goth Waterpark

“It obviously somewhat started as a joke among friends and a passion project. But we have a staff and take it seriously now - because we're legally required to do so,” John tells us.

“It's small, of course, and isn't open many days of the year but it has a loyal following, is well maintained, and it makes just enough money to stay afloat (pun!)"

Getty Images

All are what you’d call mature goths – in their forties and thirties respectively. They’ve seen a lot come and go – punk, nu metal, emo, steampunk, Rihanna’s invocation of “ghetto goth”. So they seemed like the right people to speak to, to learn more about the ways of goth.

Getty Images

Is there a pressure to look glum?

Tim

A good goth should know when to break character.

John

We love having fun. Laughing, smiling, dancing, getting drunk, and splashing around or floating lifelessly on a black pleather raft in the lazy river.

Lee

I don’t think there is any pressure to look gloomy or miserable. People do go into absolute panic when they see a goth walking his dog or doing the ironing though.

Getty Images

What’s the best product to use in your hair?

Lee

I use TRESemme Salon Finish Freeze Hold. That makes it stick like yacht varnish. If you ask people though, they’ll all have their own favourite product.

Getty Images

What do you think about other iterations of goth – like emos and steampunks?

Lee

Us older goths took a bit of a paternal or maternal view to emos. We thought, we’ll guide ‘em.

Steampunks I don’t have an issue with, but they do attract a lot of attention, which it makes more difficult for us goths. It annoys the sh*t out of us when you see an article on goths and the only pictures are of a middle aged couple from Droitwich who look like they’re from Downton Abbey.

Tim

Gentle rivalry. We get along fractiously.

Getty Images

Which way do goths vote?

Lee

I can only answer that within the realms of my own Facebook group, but I’d say most of them are Left. They grew up under Thatcher and goth has its roots in working class, Northern towns. So, I’d say mostly Labour or Left.

Tim

I put this question out recently and it came back as mostly Green. We’re liberal, woolly-headed people, but not always proper rebels.

Google

Is it difficult to be a goth in the Summer?

Lee

Yes, it’s bloody horrible. It’s just lucky that we live in Britain. We suffer, we really do.

Tim

We really do suffer.

John

Well, in southern Tennessee during the summer it does get hot and humid, but since we're only open 4 days a week, 10 weeks a year, you can't really afford to let the weather affect your plans to come or not. But yes, cloudy, cooler days are our most popular.

John Waterpark

What factor sunscreen does the average goth use?

John

I'd say SPF 30. That's what we keep in the office and what our lifeguards keep in their fanny packs (or bum bags, as we Brits say). I know the fanny packs aren't cool, but one lifeguard, Christian, actually has a black leather fanny pack with a big silver cross on the front. I wouldn't wear it but he thinks it's cool.

John, how much time do you spend cleaning hair dyes and mascara out of the pool?

At the end of a busy day there's definitely an oily film on the surface of the water in the pools, but having been to normal waterparks, that's probably just human skin oils and not unique to a goth waterpark. What's more unique is what our filters and traps vacuum up. We've found fishnet gloves, black plastic cross necklaces and earrings, and tons of bracelets. We leave them in lost and found, but they're almost never recovered.

Happy World Goth Day... have a dark one!