If you're brave enough to risk this dodgy Brazilian transvestite look this Christmas then good luck to you. To save tonsorial carnage we suggest buying a wig and lopping off half of it thereby guaranteeing the 'Twilight Mental Home Escapee' look. People on the bus will laugh but they'll also be very scared to approach you, guaranteeing a fairly easy passage to the party. Phil looks reasonably sober in this pic but a pleated, chiffon ladies top, leather trousers, stilettoes and heaps of rouge and cherry red lipstick would really complement the hair if you're feeling frisky. Just ask a glamorous auntie. Alternatively, if you are friendly with certain er, 'working girls' in the seedier areas of town, they should also be able to help. (Probably a bit pricey though.)

No such risks if you want to dress like backing singers Susanne or Jo of course. Their look was always club based and with the '80s retro fad currently in fashion you should be showing plenty of chic at the party. "We always dressed as if we were going out to a club," Susanne told TOTP. The girls here opted for a punky, alternative college girl look complete with moody pouts. Glamorous but girl next door at the same time. Add plenty of eyeliner in an Egyptian fashion, a wedge haircut (preferably with a heavy fringe over one eye) and you've got an affordable car boot sale wardrobe that shouldn't trouble your Christmas budget.